Britney Spears’ New “Piece Of Me” And Other Reviews By The Cool Kids

I won’t say anything bad about Britney, I mean she just lost her kids. I left the mean, rude remarks to Leno, Conan, and Letterman. No wait those were lame too:

LENO: Did you see this? Did you read about this? Britney Spears lost custody of her kids to Kevin Federline. True story. Unfortunately for Britney, this means the kids will only be available to drive her around the first and third Saturday of every month.CONAN: Did you hear that Britney Spears today lost a custody battle to ex-husband Keven Federline? Yeah. Apparently, Spears was really upset that the judge wouldn’t accept her first choice for legal guardian: MC Scat Kat.

LETTERMAN: So you know I was clicking on the www, ya know on the internet, there? And I saw a headline that said “Britney Spears Loses Children In Court.” And I thought, well, that’s not so bad. At least it’s safer than where she usually loses them: at the gas station.

Basically only Sarah Silverman should talk shit about Britney. Anyway, BritneyFans.org was kind enough to rip Fashion Queen Jeffree Star (we love you in that way, uh huh!) playing Britney’s “Piece Of Me” while dancing on his webcam. What an amazing way to get new music, right? The rip is extremely low quality and there’s a lot of chit chat going around the background. The song is pretty decent. I will not commit to giving it any sort of rating or attempt to play it more than a couple of times because of the lack of quality. I will however beg the internet gods for a HQ version.

mp3: Britney Spears - Piece Of Me LQ [audio=http://www.hotlinkfiles.com/files/441782_mkd3p/britney%20spears%20-%20piece%20of%20me.mp3]

*50s newscaster voice* In similar news, PopJustice and The Sun review Britney’s new material:

via POPJUSTICE:

Ignore all those terrible Britney Spears songs wafting around the internet because the new Britney album is going to be pretty good.

We know this because we’ve heard an actual song from the album, and we don’t mean ‘Gimme More’.

Here is all we have to you about it.

» It is called ‘State Of Grace’ which, as much as we love her, is not something we would ever credit Britney with knowing very much about. But not to worry.

» We would describe the track as ‘understated’ which, again, is something we would not usually credit Britney with ever being. But by understated we do not mean ‘half-arsed’. We mean ’subtle and amazing’.

» There is a bit of an Eastern influence on the track, although less so than Hilary Duff’s ‘Stranger’, which is as good a reference point for songs that have an Indian influence as we could hope to offer.

» With a bit of rejigging it might have sounded a bit like ‘With Every Heartbeat’. As it stands, it doesn’t sound much like ‘With Every Heartbeat’ at all, but it’s not a million miles away.

» The main hook is simply “love is a state of grace between you and I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I-e-I”. Contrary to what you might have just read it doesn’t sound much like ‘Old MacDonald Had A Farm’.

» It is not quite a ballad but is quite floaty and very nice indeed.

» It sounds a lot like a Britney song despite sounding like no other Britney song ever recorded.

via: The Sun Online:

I’m the first journalist in the world to hear her new album and I can tell you — BRITNEY’s back, bitch!

After firing her manager, publicist and assistant, the singer is effectively pushing this album out on to the world stage on her own.

And after my one-off preview, I can see why she has the confidence to go it alone — it’s hot!

You’ve probably already heard the single, Gimme More — which opens with the explosive line “It’s Britney, bitch”.

The track, which has been kicking around on the net for a while, failed to set the MTV stage alight thanks to her dodgy lip synching and dancing.

But I reckon the rest of the album, as yet un-named, more than justifies the hype.

Britney is at her thumping best, with heavy-duty electro pop blending brilliantly with her distinctive vocals.

The stand-out track is Piece Of Me — a personal rant about how the whole world wants something from her.

It opens with the line: “I’m Mrs American Dream, since 17, they want a piece of me.”
*

The chorus really hits home with a message about the crazy publicity circus surrounding the fallen pop princess.

She sings: “I’m successful, rich and famous, I’m Mrs Oh My God I’m Britney Shameless,

“I’m Mrs Extra, Extra, This Just In, I’m Mrs She’s Too Big, She’s Too Thin.”

It is punctuated throughout with the line “You want a piece of me” — summing up how she feels about the state of her life.This is Britney hitting back at her critics — the media, the music industry, her estranged parents and the fans who turned on her.

But there is also a love song — albeit with a beat-crunching dance vibe — called Heaven On Earth, which sounds like it is about her ex-hubby KEVIN FEDERLINE. It’s clear from the lyrics that she still loves him.

She sings: “There’s nothing I can do, I’m really crazy about you, when you’re next to me it’s just like Heaven on Earth.”

It continues: “I’d move across the world for you, just tell me when, where, I’ll come to you.”

Other stand-out tracks include Break The Ice and Radar.

They were produced by the likes of BLOODSHY & AVANT and TIMBALAND-protege DANJA, so as you’d expect, all the songs are edgy, with gut-busting beats.

Due to Brit’s chaotic lifestyle the album doesn’t have a name, the artwork isn’t finished and no one at her record label, Jive, is sure whether she will do anything to promote it.

Gimme More is out on November 5, but the release date for the album — November 12 — could change.

All the same, I reckon Britney can’t fail to convince the world she’s back, bitch. Got it!

Can you dig it?

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Tagged as: Airbrushing Not Included, Britney Spears, OMG, Wake Up Call