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Well, it’s Tuesday night and you know what that means. It’s American Idol night on PMA! Suhhhhhweet! This is Rock Week, and THIS… is American Idol (too many exclamation points? Probably so)!
Ryan enters down the multi-lighted stair case. He’s wearing my grandpa’s tie and starts telling us about an accident they had on the stage that day (apparently one of the American Idol stage towers broke down). The accident stole the contestants dress rehearsal so they are on their own. We also find out that the contestants are going to be paired up to sing duets. Interesting. We welcome the judges, we welcome the contestants, and we see Adam looking like the love child of Liza Minelli & Freddy Mercury.
We meet our mentor (Slash) and hear about how he was raised on rock & roll and treated it like a way of life. He says that he never thought that he would be a mentor on American Idol… yet HERE HE IS (he must be promoting something).
Adam is up, and he’s singing “Whole Lotta Love” by Led Zepplin. Adam should do really well this week, since he has the voice to go berserk on the high notes. He’s up and he may sound rock & roll, and seem like he’s trying to look rock & roll, but he doesn’t pull it off well. He’s wearing a whole lotta leather, the lowest v-neck shirt that American Apparel sells, and a handcuff necklace. It doesn’t matter though because he sounds freakin’ awesome (although like a few weeks ago, there’s too much rocking with the band for my taste, and it’s really cooling the performance off). Still, I shut my eyes and he sounds deluxe, and (clearly) has the skill to pull this off. I’m just not loving his stage presence tonight. Randy says, “This is the Adam that I love.” Kara calls him a “rock god” and then goes on to say that he should make a 70’s rock/80’s glam record. Paula says that he improved on a Led Zepplin song (which everyone that loves LZ is busy picking their jaws up off the floor). Si agrees and thinks there is no way anyone can compete with that.
Allison is up and she’s singing “Cry Baby.” She meets up with Slash and he says she is predisposed to the Janice Joplin song. He says she has a rock swagger and natural talent. Here she comes and she starts rough, but recovers quickly. She has a good voice for this and sounds really good, but I’ve never loved “Cry Baby” and there’s too much slowness in this song for Allison’s voice. I think she really shines in rock when she’s rocking, and this doesn’t have enough oomph for me. Bad song choice. Randy says it was a bad song choice (yep), Kara didn’t love it either, Paula says if they ever do a biopic pic on Joplin then Allison will get the job (although, we all know that Jenna Krakowski already has that job), and Simon thinks that the journey Allison has been on since the beginning is “staggering.” He thought it was just an okay song choice.
Our first of two duets is up, and it’s Gokey and Kwak singing “Rennegade.” Kris starts it out, followed by Gokerville then they team up for an accapella harmonic duet. It’s cool. Neither of these homeslices really scream rock to me, but they both sound really good. I don’t really know what else to say about this one besides that I like the duet idea. They sound particularly good on the harmony breaks. I think Kris’ voice is a little soft for this type of song, and Gokey pushes through more, but they sound good. Randy liked the acapella parts too, but not the solos. Kara agrees with Randy. Paula says “powerful and compelling” and Simon says Danny was better than Kris (to which Kwak rolls his eyes).
Kris with a K is here and he’s singing the Beatles’ “Come Together.” Yikes. This could be iffy. If I was singing a Beatles song, it would not be this one. Kris talks about seeing Slash and wanting to pee his pants, and then the performance is here. This should be interesting. It’s good, but not dynamic enough. I think Kwak is really, really relying on good looks and charm this week and not on skillz. Maybe it’s not a bad strategy since he probably knew that no matter what he did this week, Adam was gonna KILL it, so he’d go a safe route and give the teenagers a more accessible rock song. There is a fancy stripped down chorus number in the middle that’s kind of cool. It’s really good, but as I said at the beginning, not dynamic enough. We’re missing that extra zing that you wish he had this week. Randy says that he liked the vocals, but loved the guitar. Kara says it was trying to hard and that it wasn’t the best song. Paula loved his artistic delivery and says he needs more energy. Simon actually didn’t like it that much… thought it was like eating ice for lunch.
Gokey is up and he’s going Aerosmith on us (“Dream On”). Okay, this is a little dangerous because Steven Tyler has such a distinct voice, and this song his HIS. Slash sounds like he has my same reservation, and thinks he better nail the scream at the end. Here we go… He’s wearing a very non-rock purple shirt and black vest. He looks like a waiter at an upscale Chucky Cheese. He’s pitchy in the slow part at the beginning, and here comes the part he should be nervous about. Yeah, he sounds like he’s playing dress up with rock music, and I think he could be in serious trouble this week. He semi scats in the middle, and it’s a mess… geeze Danny. All you had to do was give us one more reason to vote off Allison and we would have done it… now we have to actually think about this. His scream is terrifyingly un-Aerosmith and a bad way to finish things off. Randy says it was alright and that he had “three notes jumpin’ off at once.” Kara completely insults him by saying that he took the judges comments last week too far. She says something idiotic about rock and roll being about being bold… blah, blah, blah. Paula rallies the crowd behind Gokey and then says she didn’t like it. Simon said the last note was like watching a horror movie (it was really bad) and that it didn’t work.
Allison and Adam are ready to sing us the final duet of the night. Allison comes out and flicks her hair… and here comes Adam in Nightmare Before Christmas pants that are far tighter than anything I’d ever care to see Adam in again. He also has about 632 gold chains around his neck… 3 words Adam: trying too hard. Saying that, these two sound awesome. This could be an issue for Gokey and Kwak. Randy says they are seasoned rock stars. Kara calls them rock god and rock goddess (and I’m saying hold the coronation). Paula says it was a beautiful thing. Simon says that they won the battle of the duets and that Adam may have given Allison a chance to get back into the competition.
So, that’s it for the final 4. Here’s my predictions.
Best contestant: Adam. Hands down.
Worst contestant: Gokey. Seriously… not good.
Ugliest jacket: Don’t remember now… hmmmm…
Bottom 3: Everyone but Adam.
Going home: Well, based on tonight, Gokey should go… however, Gokersville has NEVER been in the bottom 3, so I think he’s safe. Kwak certainly isn’t going anywhere, and Adam is for suresies safe… so, Allison. You’re gone despite that killer duet at the end.
What do you think? Who’s getting their marching orders tomorrow night? Comment, and let us know!
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Tags: American Idol
Allison needs to go. I think she is def. talented but I HATE HER. She just irritates me. I don’t like how she sounds the same every single song. Kwak is also on my radar—is impish grin is vomit inducing.
allison is amazing you are on crack
A music writer who doesn’t know how to spell Led Zeppelin? what is this?
ZEPPELIN
@Jillie, yeah, I kind’ve agree. She doesn’t really have much range in her ability… most songs all sound the same (and when she does show range, it isn’t that good. Like the slow parts of last night).
I do think that the final two are gonna be Kwak and Adam though… I think Gokey has an expiration date on his mass appeal.
Haha… @Michael… yeah, I caught that this morning. I write these things fast to get them out quick, so you have to excuse an error here or there (even if it is as brain-numb as missing the ‘e’ in Zeppelin). Sorry about that!
I hope Gokey goes. Eek, don’t kill me yet! I have been a fan but he just missed by a mile last night. Let’s not mince words–it was crappy. I was cringing for him, the way I cringe when I hear Michael Scott unwittingly insult his employees.
I generally dislike Allison, but I liked her spunk last night in showing down Simon. Good work, girl.
I liked KWAK last night. Granted I’m a huge KWAK fan, but still his song was much more my kind of music. I definitely think Adam did a great job, but (don’t kill me everyone) I’m not a huge Zeppelin fan. Sorry. Allison had some good moments and some okay ones. Her best definitely being the duet with Adam. That was really pretty awesome. Gokey was terrible last night. If it were up to me I’d say it’s Gokey’s time to go. I want to see KWAK and Adam in the finals together. If Allison and Adam were in the finals it would be too much of the same stuff. I like that Adam and KWAK are so different. It would make for a much more interesting final show!
Can we vote Kara off this week? She sucks. Talk about LAYING IT ON A LITTLE THICK. “Rock God”? Someone call the fire department, I think I just smelt smoke up ALL OUR ASSES.
Then she goes on to tell Gokey (who sucked, ps) that she sees him doing “OLDER AEROSMITH like Cryin’ or Crazy”. Sorry bitch, any video with Alicia Silverstone in it doesn’t even come close to qualifying as OLDER AEROSMITH.
It would be great if someone could invent a spell-check that wasn’t a spell-check, but an everything-check, and put it on Kara’s mouth. SHUT UP!!!!
oh my god – and how could I forget her “I’ll have what she’s having” moment at 3:53 of THIS video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JTDlq4d2iI
good god, i hate adam. i don’t see how they judges can give him a verbal hand job, and then turn around and say that the next contestant is “skrieking”. what the hell was it that i just sat through with adam? christ, just bc he can hit a high note doesn’t mean it’s good. i’d rather listen to my parents having sex.
I’m sorry, but there’s just something about the way Adam sings that song that lets you know he heard it maybe one or two times before this contest. He’s a 2009 Mustang: shiny, glorious, and fast as hell, with none of the character and history that makes a classic. I hate to sound trite, but his rendition had zero soul, zero flavor, and to top it all off he still scares the crap out of me.
Allison ► You stupid bitch. Don’t fucking argue when the judges are just trying to give you criticism. Bitch.
Kara ► I don’t give a crap for what you say.
Kris ► Eww, the mouth. The song, I think you’re gone.
Danny ► ZzzzZZzz
The best part about Danny’s performance was that crazy ass necklace he wore last night. It’s like he had a bicycle chain around his neck, that thing was HUGE.